Life is hard sometimes. We all have blindspots and we all get blindsided from time to time with personal and business "growth opportunities". The sudden appearance of critical new issues can and often does trigger intense fear and self-doubt and it's easy to overreact and make them worse. Whether we see a problem as an opportunity or threat is usually a matter of perspective. When we temporally lose our perspective, it's the people in our inner support circle who are there to help us reset it.
Last week I had the opportunity to work through several very challenging and ultimately interesting business problems. As I am currently in the middle of making a few key life and business transitions and unpacking some new skills and strengths, I am particularly sensitive to certain kinds of triggers that even six months ago would not have phased me. During the week I reached out to several friends and associates and managed to recalibrate my mindset and moods with their help.
A solid support network helps us keep perspective.
Several years ago I took a cofacilitating course taught by Marita Fridjohn. She and her life and business partner Faith Fuller created an entire relationship coaching curriculum called Organizational and Relationship Systems Coaching. During that last course Marita shared an experience of working with her partner in an off-site with a company. A participant came at Faith very aggressively (which is normal in a program as participants are working through their own issues). Marita and Faith were at the front of the room side-by-side at the time. Marita took one step forward to face the attack head on, her body language not-so-subtly declaring "you've got to go through me to get to her".
(The short scene from The Bear is some of the finest 4 minutes of cinematography I've ever seen and illustrates this point beautifully. Please take the time to watch it. It's the kind of art that changes people.)
None of us gets anywhere truly worthwhile alone.
A friend is someone who knows where you've been, appreciates who you really are and gently (and sometimes less gently) nudges you forward. This is a good day to acknowledge the people who have been there for you. At some crucial juncture one of your supporters was the difference between you succumbing to your stress and crumbling in the face of a seemingly insurmountable obstacle and performing at your best, overcoming the obstacle and accomplishing something worthwhile. Take a minute. Make a call. Send an email or text. Just to say, "thank you: It's working itself out. I really appreciate that you were there for me".